The Engine Running on Victimization
and some Girardian-inspired ways to change
The conservative Christians feel justified in their anger because they have bought into the idea that their way of life is under siege. With backs up against the wall (supposedly), they feel the panicked need to legitimize their importance, tighten boundaries, and generally increase their bizarre practice of claiming to be victims even as they victimize.
Meanwhile, the progressive Christians feel justified in their anger because they have bought into the idea that they are the true defender of victims. This justifies their canceling culture, legitimizes their importance, and generally increases the practice of “using” the victim for their benefit. Some days, one wonders whether the progressive really wants to eliminate all the victimizing ways; I mean, how would they operate in such an environment? How would they formulate an identity? What is a progressive without a victim?
We imitate the other.
Over-legitimize the concerns of the other.
Make the other our rival.
Once the other becomes our rival, really? Nothing else matters. The “theyification” of all things has taken place, and the only response is defeating the other.
This will not work for humanity. I am no prophet, but I guarantee it will do nothing but increase the speed at which we turn to real violence. Violence always winds up being our answer to end violence (as illogical as all that is).
What is a way out of this madness? Well, here are five escape routes (along with one nod toward the reality of evil).
- Consider that your desires are the same as the one you imagine to be your rival. See yourself in them.
- If/when you see yourself in them, be compassionate to yourself, which will also be compassionate to them.
- To gain peace, you do not have to go around the obstacle; to gain peace, you must go throughthe obstacle. In other words, deal with the desires being stirred up by that person, don’t pretend they don’t exist. (Easier said than done!)
- Slow down. Listen. Be patient. Figure out ways to get out of the cycle of mimetic rivalry, the outcome of which is scapegoating. Social media and 24/7 news are not all bad, but in the ways that they are, they are so because they act like a performance-enhancing drug to our age-old obsession with the other. The explosion (implosion?) of all the cultural and sub-cultural wars is nothing more than mimetic rivalry on steroids.
- Even with all of this,sigh… I’m not sure information can change our minds. We don’t desire what we desire because we don’t know better… we don’t know better because of what we desire. I’m pretty sure, having worked with lots of folks at this point and having worked with the voices in my own soul, that for our desires to change, we need to locate people in our lives who aren’t energized by all the mimetic dysfunction … yes, find them, and imitate their behavior. (Oh, and I’d like to nominate Jesus as someone you might imitate!)
Finally, though I risk casting doubt on much I’ve said here, something must always be said about the reality of evil. There will be moments in our lives where, despite pursuing the ideas above, we will conclude that, in fact, someone is attempting to victimize us. If that is so, my encouragement is for you to take precautions. Your choice to submit is precisely that: your choice. I do not believe love will command, demand, or reprimand you down any one specific path, let alone one that is meant for your demise. So be gracious, but don’t be afraid to think for yourself, and be safe.
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