I confess I've always had trouble appreciating the Psalms. Though there's some lines that I cherish, I can get distracted by how the psalm can quickly turn into a rant–against all the enemies and evildoers, cursing them with violence sometimes, touting the singer's own innocence and righteousness.
My mentor Bob would laugh and give me a hard time about this: "Chris, you're a songwriter and a worship leader–how can you not like the Psalms? They're songs, man, prayers. They're written by sinful people like us crying out, uncensored. It's cool that the Bible welcomes human prayers like ours. Just think of the guys in jail we love so much, how they could relate to the psalmists' raw cries." Bob knew how to bring me back to a text.
So below is a glimpse of one man in the pit Nini–when he was still in solitary confinement–relating to the Bibles' poetry of lament. Then, a sample of his own rap/psalm he sent me last week.
May you be moved to write or cry out your own, in solidarity with the Biblical tradition and all the unheard cries like Nini's across our land.
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From the Lowest Pit
I started reading Lamentations. Pues on Lam 3:55 it says, “I called on your name from the lowest pit.”
I was just thinking about in Jeremiah 38 when he was in the dungeons he probably felt like how we feel, crying to God, “Why me?” and just beating ourselves up. Me entiendes?
Dude I am going on in Lamentations and this whole chapter is fucking beautiful bro. You gotta read it. He like cries how I do, kinda blaming God for algo, like he or I feel left on stuck. And then he gives gracias to him after crying it all out. Kinda like me. I’ll blame him for C. bouncing on me, but after all my pain is out, I’ll apologize or thank him for the strength. I am gonna re-read Jeremiah again. There is more there for me to pick out.
Psalm from Solitary
1
Growing up to yells and gun-shots
Women getting sold and beaten on my block
Kids running wild with evil lil’ smiles
Homies getting shot with no 2nd thought
Families being destroyed by a color or race
Homies ducking gun shots as we’re getting chased
Putting in work is how it had 2 be,
Just so you can get recognized up in the streets
This was the life I used 2 lead
Back when I was blind and being deceived
GOD opened up my eyes to a brand new life,
Gave me a 2nd shot to continue my fight
He helped me to see, what’s wrong and right,
Gave me the power to shine so bright
So I can’t forget the familiar faces,
The ones that stood with me through all my fazes
For the ones who left me on stuck,
I forgive you and wish you the best of luck
And to the homies who passed away
In mi Corazon your names’ engraved
I only ask that you hold our place
For when us homies show our face.
2
Can’t even put in words, the pains that I felt
From losing 2 brothers to homies getting killed
Watching mothers fall to their knees, in agony,
As they bury their sons 6 feet deep
Children confused and seeking for love,
Young girls selling their bodies just for a drug
These are my streets, the pains run deep,
Homies twisting their fingers as they bang to the beat
People stereotyping and trying to kill my kind,
Stick us in the system so we don’t shine
Show no remorse to the pain that they’ve caused,
They look at our lives and see it as a loss
Father, let’s stand by these Gs,
Help them to see underneath all these tattoos, is a kid in need
Trying to fight my trials for a better revelation,
Your words give me the strength to overcome my temptation
Thank you Lord for your participatation,
You blessed me Lord, your name I keep praising
I’ll continue to battle for the homies and the cause,
For the ones in the system and the homies that are lost.
3
Two worlds divided, a brown and a white kid slowly united
In God we trust, to fight off these demons and things we lust
So pray for us, to lead the way
To guide lil homies to better days
On our knees praying for mercy,
Asking God to open up the doors, for me and my Gs
Society is blinded, because of our troubles,
Lil’ do they know it’s part of our struggles
But with the power of Christ, we’re destined to rise,
Overcome all the evil and hate inside
Look deep in our eyes, see the pain we disguise,
We’re just a bunch of homies trying to survive
Don’t hate on me, cuz I choose to be free,
I just want a better life, for me an my Gs
So we all gotta rise, let people know we’re different inside,
Attack all the stereotypes and the system that lies
Jesus, give me the strength to proceed on this path,
To bear light for the homies through pains of my past
Let me open the door, for all my enemies,
Show ‘em if we continue to fight, will be overcome by defeat
This life wont be easy, but we gotta give it a try,
Because if we stick to our past we’re destined to die
Lord show us whats right, through our prayers at night,
Guide us through the day for a better tonight.
Beautiful.